Last night I attended a concert at the Rady Shell located in Jacobs Park near downtown San Diego.
As I made my way, I was apprehensive and nervous about being alone. It’s weird because I am good at being by myself within the comforts of my routine and home. I am, my most creative and imaginative self when I experience art alone; however, our culture will say I am nuts for going to a concert by myself. My own son said he would skip an event if he did not have someone to go with him. To me the alternative of missing out on an experience was NOT enough to keep me away.
Live music is where you get the inspiration and the creativity.
Paul Rodgers
Live music is one of the things I missed most in the middle of the pandemic. And I know there are a ton of people who are still avoiding crowds but, fear is not going to keep me away.
“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage.”
Anais Nin
My son first introduced me to the music of Maggie Rogers while he was in high school. She reminded me of Lauren Hill with a sound I found myself listening to while writing, painting or creating. Between the beats and lyrics, I found myself moving along and wanting more.
Her live performance lacked in nothing. Dancing, singing and engaging with the crowd while entertaining with her beautiful voice and spunky fun infectious attitude.
At the end of the concert, I navigated my way back downtown and stopped to take in the majestic night.
This morning as I sat with my coffee and journaled, I realized I am blessed with this life where I can explore what it means to engage with the world of art alone and I get to crawl into bed at the end of the night with my husband. He has never stopped me in my crazy endeavors and has always encouraged me to explore the world (as safely as I can).
In the recent history there has been a lot of divorces from creatives I follow and after the divorce many of these women talk about learning about codependency and gaining their independent after divorce.
Last night I began to wonder if maybe divorce would not be so prevalent if women began to explore what it would be to heal and become independent within the constructs of marriage. Is this even possible or are adventures of mine a sign of what is to come? I’d like to believe we can be independent while maintaining healthy relationships. We can begin to build a seperate identity from our children and husbands while staying attached to them.
“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”
Eleanor Roosevelt
This journey of healing and learning to embrace my independence has not been easy and yet, I believe it is a saving grace to have the ability to confidently explore the world outside the many different hats we wear in life.
